Marco and Jake Meet Tenchi
by Cyber Hyena
Summary: My first fic! What happens when Marco comes to Japan to help Tenchi with his troubles? Feel sorry for Jake and Tenchi. R


**MARCO AND JAKE MEET TENCHI**

Episode V: A False Hope

(Authors note: This story takes place during the Tenchi Muyo series. No wenier dogs were harmed in the making of this story.)

(Disclaimer: I don't own Tenchi Muyo! or Animorphs, and I'm not making any freaking money! Tenchi Muyo! belongs to Pioneer Co and Animorphs belong to Schoolastic.)

Marco was on is computor late at night looking up certain web sites. He thought it nice to take a break from saving the world and to do something relaxing for a change of pace. Then he got an urgent E-mail massage.It was from his Japanese pen pal, Tenchi Misaki.

_Marco, I'm having woman trouble, please help me!!!_

So what up, can't get a date?

No I have 6 crazy housemates, they're all women and they are all from outer space. They also have the hots for me! 

And the problem is?

They constantly compet for me! The two worst ones constantly are flirting with me, fight all the time and grab me if the fighting involves me! My health won't last long with them around! HELP ME!!!!!

Okay, now I see your point, I'll come over there in a few days. I'll bring a back up. Any thing about the two who fight the most over you?

Yeah one is royalty and related by blood to me. The other is a space pirate who realy atracted to me for somereason. Oh and the pirate is realy strong.

Space Pirate? Royalty? Whoa, I'm definatly need a sucker,er friend to help me on this one.

Hurry, oh no their at it again. Please come!!! AAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!

Tenchi? Dude you still there?

…………………

Marco: "Wow, he has one hell of a problem. I can get a credit card from my dad with out any problem and now I need my back up man. A person to help me, a person to give me ideas, and mostly take all the pain and suffering……..JAKE!"

He quickly dialed Jake's number and got his brother Tom(A controller,) and requested Jake.

Jake: "Hey Marco, what's up?"

Marco: "The sky, the clouds, the sun…."

Jake: "Okay, why did you call me, besides to be a smart ass?"

Marco: "Have a friend in Japan with real problems, he's desprate."

Jake: "First of all, Does it involve Yeerks?"

Marco: "No, crazy women, with hots for my friend. They savagely compete for him and usaly either hurt him or each other."

Jake: "Even worse, NO! And you can't talk me into it."

Marco: "Aw common dude, they're hotties."

Jake: "I have Cassie."

Marco: "It'll be fun."

Jake: " What's fun?"

Marco: "Never mind, just please?"

Jake: "No."

Marco: "Please?"

Jake: "No."

Marco: "Pleeeaassee?"

Jake: "No!"

Marco: "Pleeeeaaaaaassssseeeeee?"

Jake: "NO!! DAMN IT!!! NO!!!!!!!"

2 hours Later…..

Jake and Marco were sitting on a jet bound for Japan, non stop. Marco was pleased with himself and enjoyed the luxuries of first class accommodations. Jake was brooding as the plane lifted off, taking them to ultiamte madness.

Jake: "You'd make a good lawyer, sleeze boy."

Marco: "That's Mr. Sleeze Boy."

They continued on towards Japan and Jake finally loosened up, though it still boggled his mind on how easy they got the plane seats. They guy at the counter had actualy belived Marco's story about his dad lending him the credit card. The made it in to the airport at Tyoko and claimed their luggage at customs Then after waiting for a long time, they got a cab and drove across Tyoko and finaly ended at a path leading into the woods. They began to walk the long flight of stairs up to the place were Tenchi lived, then came an exlposhion, folowed by three vioces(one male, two female,) and sounds of a battle. Marco and Jake stared at each other and continued their journy.

Marco: "Jake, I am I in your will."

Jake: "Why?"

Marco: "No reason."

He and Jake advaced to a gate with two robot Sentinals standing near it, they looked like logs. They begrudgingly let the two Animorphs through and they came upon a very usal sceen in this house. Crown Princess Ayeka and Ryoko were fighting again, they always did. They were playing shove push with each other that turned in to a cat fight, near by Tenchi sat with a look of utter dispair on his face. Jake glared at Marco, doing Jake's chores wasn't going to be enough for this job.

Jake: " I want $10 for doing this job."

Then Ryoko and Ayeka fell on the ground Tearing at each others hair and faces and clothing.

Jake: "Make that $20."

Marco stepped forward with a very reluctant Jake and inroduced them selves and inlized Marco's first plan.

Marco: "Hi I'm Marco, the chatty one and Tenchi's pen pal from America. This is Jake, my bodyshield,er best friend."

Ryoko: "Nice to meet you…Rrrrraaaaaaaaa!!!!"

Ayeka: " A pleasure….Eeeeeeaaaaa!!!!!!"

Tenchi: "They'll be alright, I think. Thank God you came!"

Jake: "Are they always like that?"

Tenchi: "Yes, unfortunatly, the others aren't as bad as these two, but are still crazy!"

Jake glared at his partner again as he started pulling out supplies.

Marco: "I know, 30."

Jake: "No, 40."

One of the women, Washu, crept up and grabbed Tenchi and started lead him away, but then the other two haulted their bitch fight and knocking the deminutive scientist away and latched on to Tenchi and began their classic Boy Tugg of War™. Marco gabbed Tenchi when it started and insurted Jake in Tenchi's place. They didn't even noice, They were concentrating on each other.Then Marco dragged Tenchi away from the carnage and led him around the house.

Jake: " 50! 60!! 70!!!! 80!!!! 90!!!!! 100!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Upon hearing Jake's voice they let go of him and fought about who lost Tenchi, unintionaly stepping on Jake as he lay there. Then they sepratly ran off to search for their source of affection. Marco then came running by with Tenchi in his wake. Marco picked up Jake and brushed him off.

Marco: *pant* *pant* "Here Jake, take Tenchi and hide him!"

Jake(in a slured voice,): "No more for me thankss, I'm tha driver."

Marco (shaking Jake by the cloar,): "Snap outta it!"

Jake: "You now owe me $130."

Marco: "I said snap out of it."

Reluctantly Jake ushered Tenchi to the forest and up a tree, climbing to the highest branch. They both leaned back and caught their breathes. Out of nowere Ryoko apeared above them and surprised them, causing them to fall out of the tree and land in akward angles.

Ryoko: "Are you guys alright?"

Tenchi and Jake: "Oww-ww-www…"

Marco: "Where's the nearest hopital?"

THE NEXT DAY……….

Marco and Jake came out of their temporary quarters. Jake had a broken arm in a sling and Tenchi had sprained his wrist, both were covered with cuts and bruises. Marco was about to implament plan "B." When the women didn't notice, Marco ran off with Tenchi and Jake replaced him with an inflateable Tenchi decoy. They both met upsatirs in their room.

Jake: "This won't work. I mean common, they won't even belive that I'm him, Marco, for God's sakes, they don't wear glasses and aren't that stupid! But for Tenchi's sake, I'll do it, but now you owe me $140."

Marco: "Jeeze, you drive a hard bargin, now you head towards the woods, while Tenchi and I go to the floating bathhouse." _How I'm I gonna pay Jake back? He wants cash up front!_

Jake fearfuly snuck out then purposely ran passed the girls, out in the open. Ryoko and Ayeka shreiked with delight and gave chase like hounds after a fox. They ran all over the shrine grounds and as he ran past the house, he saw Ryoko dive from above and Ayeka from the left side. Before they hit him, he pulled out a blind fold and put it on as they takled him. A huge dust cloud rose in the following choas and confusion.

Ayeka: "Tenchi's mine!"

Ryoko: "No Mine!!!!"

Both: "I've got him!!!!"

Jake: "HELP ME MARCO!!!!!!!! OW!!!!!!! OWCH!!!!!! THE PAIN!!!!!!!!"

Both: "Huh?" 

They stopped World War III and straitened up. There amid the dust lay Jake, mangled, bruised and genrally uncomfortable. They helped him up and brushed himoff.

Ayeka: "Are you all right?"

Jake: " S'kay, I'm perfectly fine." *Ummppphhh*

Ryoko: "If this isn't Tenchi, then where is he?"

Tenchi and Marco wre at that moment, hiding in the bathhouse, underwater to be exact. Tenchi tapped Marco on the shoulder and pointed up to the surface. They burst through the water gasping.

Tenchi: *gasp* *gasp* "How long are we gonna keep this up? I feel like a sreamed carrot!"

Marco(checking his water proof watch,): "I'd say another hour or so."

They both dived again, Tenchi survaied his suroundings and let out his breath when he saw Ryoko face to face with him. She smiled and waved at him as he burst topside for lack of air, acidently stomping on Marco's head. Ryoko surfaced beside him and put her arms around him, while at that moment Marco surfaced gasping like a fish, Ryoko kicked him way to make things more romantic.

Ryoko: " It's really cozy in here, soothing waters, peaceful suroundings, a beatuiful woman.."

Marco: "And of course his zany friend! With me, it's more fun! Almost a party!!"

Ryoko placed her hand on Marco's head and voilently dunked him. They were alone for 30 seconds more then Ayeka joined them. Marco surfaced was proptly dunked again, this time by Ayeka. Marco retailated by grabbing for the nearest pair of feet, wich he asumed were either Ayeka's or Ryoko's, but were actualy Tenchi's. He dragged the hapless boy under water and with all his might, hurled poor Tenchi out of the water and into the glass dome, he slid down the window with a squashed face. Marco spent the next 4 hours running from Ryoko and Ayeka, while Washu called an ambulance for Tenchi and Jake and they made a trip to the hospital, again.

THE NEXT, NEXT DAY……….

Marco and Jake sat outside, Marco was thinking and Jake was trying to relax. Jake had bandages over his ribs and one shoulder , more bruises, and a sprained ankle. Marco now owed him $180.50. Tenchi had a broken, wrist cracked ribs, and a broken nose. Marco's ludicrist plan "C" was to take three of the girls out on a date and keep them off of Tenchi for a while. Jake of course told Marco he was absurd but for some damn reason, he'd do it, out of pity for Tenchi and for $190. They came into the hall way to find Ryoko and Ayeka begging at the bathroom door for Tenchi to come out with Washu looking on, he was curled up on the floor like the Fly™ and wimpering with fear.

Marco: "You know, you should give Tenchi his breathing room, maybe date someone else for a change. We just happen to be avialble and there's a dance in the park tonight." _Damn, I wish I had Tenchi's luck, the sly dog._

Jake: "W-we'd be glad to take the three of you, one with me, one with Marco, and one with Tenchi. Sound fair? _I must be mad!_

Marco: "Come on out Tenchi, we have found a soultion to the problem! You get to pick one of these lovely ladies for your date tonight, and Jake and I take the other two. You can come out and stop hiding from them!" _And I use the term "ladies" loosely._

Tenchi: " I'm not hiding from them, I'm hiding from you."

Marco: "Oh."

Tenchi: " I'll come out only if I don't have to spend the night in an emergancy room again."

Marco: "Trust me."

Tenchi reluctantly came out of the John and sat near by as Ayeka, Ryoko and Washu huddled after 20 minutes of aruguing and fighting between Ayeka and Ryoko, they came to decision. Tenchi hoped this would end the mayhem, Jake was at that moment rubbing his bandged ribs, and Marco was briming over with hormones.

Washu: " Here's our decision, I'll go with Marco, since he would end up with his head up his buttox if he went with Ryoko or Ayeka, Ryoko agreeded to take Jake and let Princess Ayeka be the lucky woman to date Tenchi."

At the dance, things went smoothly, for the first hour or so, then things heated up. Ryoko had been longingly glancing at Tenchi as he danced with Ayeka. She couldn't stand it any more when Ayeka made a mocking face at her, she boiled with anger and turned to Jake, who was atempting to dance with a broken arm and a sprained ankle. He was failing misrably at it.

Ryoko: "Listen Jake, you're a nice guy and all but since you have a girlfriend already and I know you'd like to remain loyal to her. So I'll be over check on Tenchi, don't take it too hard, Bye!!"

Jake: "Whatever."

Mean while Marco was enjoying himself emensely, dancing with Washu in his natural envroment, a crowd of people having a good time. The mega ginuess slipped away while her partner went into his Lord Of The Dance Impression™. Tenchi was slow dancing with Ayeka as the aproprate music came up. He was relaxed and atcualy enjoying this event, he was slightly om edge as he swayed with the princess, he learned by now that anything could happen and probly would. He soon found himself in the arms of Ryoko, he then felt strong pangs of foreboding in system. Then he had to bend over to dance with his newest partner, Washu, and silient alarms balred in his head. Then a shoving war began between Ayeka and Ryoko, knocking Washu away from Tenchi. Jake and Tenchi stood by and watched the two women fight Then suddenly the crowd decieded to back off and give the comatents space. Jake watched as th mob came at him and tried to put on his blindfold, but got trampled by the seithing mass of teenagers with it half way out of the pocket. Then during the fight, Ryoko acidently knocked over one of the speakers, it crashed and burst in to flames which spread rapidly to a baner. The crowd panicked and shifted towards the area where Tenchi was, he fortunatly had time ot put on a blindfold and was promptly crushed under the surge of humanity. The police and fire department arived and soon the fire was out, Ryoko and Ayeka went to seprate cells down town, and Tenchi and Jake were rushed into intensive care. Marco trooped back to the Misaki residance with Washu, they need to raise bail for their friends in the cooler. A thought ran through Marco's mind: _I wonder what'll be like to have my head up my ass?_

1 WEEK LATER…….

Jake sat in a wheel chair next to Tenchi's bed, making a collect call home to his cousin back in America. Jake had two broken legs, the same arm and rib injuries, a neck brace, and a swollen eye. Tenchi's limbs were all in casts, he had broken ribs, and he had three concusions. Jake's relitive, Rachel(another Animorph,) she didn't apear to be pissed about the charges for the cross contient call.

Jake: "Yeah, meet us at the airport tommarow, our flight is #874. Bring the others. See you later, Say hi to my mom for me."

Tenchi: "Going home so soon?"

Jake: "Yeah, I also have to bring Marco home too, before he kills the two of us."

Tenchi: "Come and vist us next summer, but please don't do me any favors,okay?"

Jake: "You have a deal my man."

Then Marco and the girls came to vist. Marco bailed the 2 of them out two days ago and was in a very sorry state, he had been living in his quarters for the last week. They forgave him slightly and let him come with them to vist the wounded. They went back to Tenchi's pad for their last night in Japan. Then the nxt moring, the two Animorphs left for home. The rest of their team came to greet them, with shocked faces.

Rachel: "Jake, what the @!$#!!! Happened?!!!"

Jake: It's a long painful story, but the ending is that Marco now owes me $500 cash money."

Marco: " Your going to enjoy squeezing every cent out of me, aren't you?"

Jake: "Indeedy Do."

Ax: "Prince Jake, did you and this 'Tenchi Misaki' have a great battle?"

Jake: "I'll tell you on the way to the barn. Ow!"

At The Barn…….

Rachel: "Marco, you dumbass! You almost got Jake and Tenchi killed!"

Marco: "Well I brought him back in one pice didn't I?!!"

Rachel: "Yeah with many cracks and splinters."

Ax: Maybe I should acompany Marco on his next visit. It would be interesting to finaly meet the Universe's Greatest Scientist for the first time. I've read her work and it boggles the mind!

Tobais flys in and preens himself as he glance out the barn hayloft.

Tobais: Bad news for Marco. Your dad's marching up here double time and he's carring a bill that's longer then Ax's tail. I here Cancoon Mexico is nice this time of year Marco.

Marco: "You know I miss Tenchi already, I think I'll go back for a while. See you in a year or so. I'll send you the money!"

Jake: "Just as long as isn't all in Yen."

Rachel: "Marco, I'd mock you but the chalange is gone."

Marco: "Whatever."

THE END 

__ __


End file.
